Cruel Teacher, or Demanding Teacher?

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Following up on the recent posts from Bruce Hembd, the topic of the CT (Cruel Teacher) is one that has resonated with many horn players and has brought some thoughts to greater clarity for myself. I think in this current time of stresses and struggles, it is a particularly important topic to look at as we all reflect on the past and look ahead to new things.

Many of us have had a CT at some point. In my own case, I did not have one until grad school, and having gone to a small college for undergrad (and having started as a music business major) I did not come into that program wrapped up in the harder edge world of performance and private teachers of this type. I did work hard and learn a lot from the CT, but it was at the same time a difficult time that led to me burning out, leaving college for a year and a half, and a recovery of my own with other teachers helping me keep my horn playing on track.

The part of the topic I’d like to focus on today is about how the CTs of the past and present view themselves, and what we can learn from this and apply to our own horn playing and recovery.

Is being demanding cruel?

The line between being demanding and being cruel is a fine line. Of course, any good teacher is demanding to some extent.

But there is a category of teacher that stakes their reputation on being very demanding of their students. Those demands, to their mind, are simply part of their teaching methodology. No cruel intentions; student success is the goal. But that methodology begins to be cruel if it includes over the top things such as:

  • Recommending that students do something perfectly 100 to 200 times in a row
  • Starting every freshman in Maxime-Alphonse book IV regardless of actual playing level
  • Giving excessively hard assignments such as sophomores learning long modern etudes in E horn
  • Required warmup materials of excessive difficulty level
  • Requiring students to memorize a solo before bringing it into the first lesson
  • Telling a student that they will never have “the X factor”
  • Telling a student that they are simply cruising on talent rather than working hard enough
  • Mind games like asking a music ed student what their favorite methods instrument was, and offering to contact the teacher of that instrument about changing your major instrument to that
  • Assigning Kopprasch 10 in every lesson for months, rather than work on the same skills in other materials

All of these (real) examples I believe were meant to be motivators, to make you work harder and filter out the weak. Some students have the (false) idea that this type of CT is exactly what they need. Let go of that mindset, it is not a good one.

Sometimes students just want the wrong type of teacher

Some students at the very least think they need a teacher that will “kick their a**” and make them work. This creates some actual market demand for the CT.

One thing you need from any teacher is honest feedback. Another thing you need is for them to show some level of problem solving skills to help you get better. The teacher is there to help you progress toward your goals in some systematic and effective way.

On the other hand, something the CT needs are very talented students, so talented and lacking in problems that they can’t screw them up. Be cautious, there is a category of teacher that is well-known but in reality has a very limited range as a teacher. They may have a system, a great system even, but they really only understand their own system, and you may not fit in and never really make any real progress. Not to mention they may be cold or uncaring (it’s not their problem that you can’t play Maxime-Alphonse book IV!) or have too much going on in their life and career to help you much. Don’t be a cog in their machine.

Aside: If you don’t get in the studio of the famous teacher, is it time to quit horn?

This idea is a variation of something I have written about before. My personal perspective is a lot different, as I was not a real hot prospect out of high school. With my embouchure problems I would never have been accepted to say Eastman as an undergrad. And here I am now, full Professor of horn at Arizona State. Don’t quit if you stumble due to a teacher or a school not accepting you. Being around optimistic people is more important in the big picture. 

Is it just business?

Another thing to be aware is for some teachers, teaching is just business. A thing they do, a thing they have been doing for a long time. “The teaching gig.” They have lost some of the sense of responsibility they have as mentors to treat every student as being important — that every single one is an individual worthy of your attention, someone that loved music when they started studies with you and should still love it when the studies end.

On the other hand, as a student you might, to be honest, do better to look at lessons as just business. Don’t wrap up your identity in how each lesson goes. Focus on how these lessons help you toward your goals overall. Draw out the good and forget the bad. Let the lesson experience just be what it is.

Aside: Can you have a conversation with another horn player and not talk horn?

At one point between degrees there was a time I met with another student of my CT for dinner. Pasta with red sauce! She set down a rule that we could talk about anything other than horn. It was difficult at first but actually really healing and memorable, a turning point for me. We would do better to talk less horn and more everything else.

More to life than music

I’ve talked about this elsewhere in Horn Matters, but a story is worth sharing again. Years ago in The Horn Call I read an interview with a famous horn teacher. One question they were asked was about their hobbies, and the answer they gave was that their hobby was self-improvement. Honestly, this is the definition of someone that needs a hobby.

Advocating that students are to live the music, breathe the music, eat, sleep, and literally be the music 24 hours a day is very problematic. I remember the first time I met someone with this type of mindset when I was a student, a flute player, and it just puzzled me. Horn playing (music) is something you do, but it is not your entire life. You need friendships, hobbies, faith, and interests outside music. Balance! Even Verne Reynolds had a real hobby!

Some people will find it helpful to keep your music side in sort of a mental box. You do music when you do music. Do it well! When not doing music, you put the music away in the box and live life like a regular person. A lot of professional musicians live like this in reality.

Is it a teacher persona?

This is a good question. I’m convinced some teachers develop and carefully project a CT persona that is different than their real persona. At least I hope it is just a persona! My assumption is that they must have friends they can be completely real with, because if what I’ve interacted with is their real personality I have questions.

Coda: The overly positive teacher can also be cruel

Be aware too that there is an opposite teacher personality, that while much more enjoyable to be around, is also one to avoid: the overly positive teacher.

This loops back again to the topic of honest feedback. The danger is that the overly positive teacher is at some point just telling you what they think you want to hear instead of giving an honest feedback.

One teacher I knew well, beloved in many ways, was prone to telling a student overly positive things. Such as they are right there, going to win an audition very soon, etc. Later the student would figure out the reality that they were further away from their goals than they thought.

Fine?

This is a big topic and I’ll be back with more. For now I’d like to close with the idea that there is an art to giving helpful criticism in an honest and helpful way. I’m not perfect, no teacher is, but the best overall teachers work to find that balance. As you ponder the topic of the CT, be looking for that balance.


Other posts in this series:

University of Horn Matters