The Politics of Clamology (II)


Continued from Part I.

What about the much maligned “clam” – the common term used for cracked notes on the French horn?

Of course if you haven’t seen it already, a hilarious, tongue-in-cheek YouTube video “The Lexicon of Clamology” covers all the known terminology in detail, including demonstrations.

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We have countless malapropisms for missed notes but they lack the sensitivity, the poetry and the diabolical wit of modern political propaganda. Music critics commonly use the politically obtuse phrase “spirited performance” as code for an energetic but technically imperfect concert, but beyond this I can’t think of many others.

Is it possible to say something yet nothing about our clams as deftly as politicians?

For your consideration:

  • mollusk of mass detraction
  • harmonic overpopulation
  • oversights of musical intent
  • performed with:
    frantic purpose, brutal elegance, barbaric gallantry or flawed perfection
  • a notational insurgency
  • collateral melodic damage
  • improvised error device (IED)
  • …a bitty boo-boo?

Any ideas?

[Further reading of interest: Propaganda Critic]

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